Why are the birds angry?

I recently purchased a new Android phone and I am worried that I am becoming one of "those people". The good news is that it isn't an iPhone, so at least I won't be one of "those other people". Fun fact, people who have iPhones are the most annoying out of all people who own cellphones (including old people and tweens). This was a welcome upgrade from my Blackberry Tour, which was a pretty badass phone two years ago when it first came out. I do miss certain features on my Blackberry, such as the useful autocorrect, my little trackball, and brickbreaker, the best game to come with a phone, or so I thought...

 Here is a picture of Barack Obama playing brickbreaker. All the cool kids do it. Also, according to this article, I am way better than him at brickbreaker.

One of my first official acts on my new Droid was to download Angry Birds so I could understand what all those jokes and references from last year were all about. I've had this phone about three weeks and it is pretty safe to say I might have an Angry Birds addiction. Maybe I just have an addictive personality? I definintely had a brickbreaker problem, and that game wasn't half as cool.

One thing that puzzles me is the lack of a back story to Angry Birds. Namely, why the eff are these birds so angry? And what is the deal with the pigs? The only explanation that the game infers is that the pigs stole the birds' eggs. Other than some ambiguous graphics, I see little evidence to support these accusations, and there is a whole separate host of questions that go a long with this theory (why did the pigs steal the eggs, how did they do it without opposable thumbs, etc.). A quick Google search, suggests that the birds are angry because they are constantly hurled into walls, or because they lack feet. Whatever the reason, I find it troubling that it can be so easy to become addicted to something that has had so little thought put in to the backstory. Why, back in my day, video game developers put thought into these matters. Although it is still a little unclear why Bowser kidnapped Princess Peach (probably to bone her, right?) and how he got all of the mushrooms and turtles to go along with his evil plan.

Wikipedia has perhaps the most official and least satisfying answer. It notes that while the app was being developed, there was a need for a villain and the swine-flu scare was in progress. Seriously, people? That is the lamest thing I have ever heard of in my life.

If the developers wanted a super villain, I should think humans would have been a logical choice. After all, we have done far more to supress the freedom of birds that most other species. People who know me well know that I have a deep irrational fear of birds. Although the majority of birds give me the creeps, the biggest culprits are pigeons and giant black crows. I know I am not alone in my fear of birds, although my friends give me a hard time about it and it has resulted in some awkward social situations (e.g. screaming on the streets of Chicago). Perhaps Angry Birds is a catharsis for me and my pent up rage towards birds of all kind. Maybe I am able to catapult birds into brick walls and layers of glass with great skill because I know it is something that I will never have the chance to do in real life.

See? Birds are evil and would eat each others brains given the chance.

And now to end on a lighter note...