You know I used to have a blog...

You know I used to have a blog. Actually, I had a Xanga. Do you remember Xanga? Xanga was something that people used who weren't cool enough to have a Live Journal. Yes, Live Journal used to be a big flippin' deal. It was like Google+, you had to have an invitation to get one. Now, I believed both sites are probably on the same level of MySpace in terms of their progression towards becoming totally obsolete. Nevertheless, Xanga was pretty sweet to a young college student who had recently outgrown their Lisa Frank diary (important note: Lisa Frank was totally badass back in the day. It was also probably the closest I will ever get to doing acid. See picture at the bottom).

My Xanga was full of post-teen angst (a term I invented to describe teen angst that one experiences in their 20's). I recently went back to my old Xanga and downloaded everything into a word document. Reading it was quite a trip. I was pretty good about blogging regularly, even if they were stupid posts like what movie I saw that weekend and who I hung out with. However, it was the deeper stuff that really drew you in. I was concerned about things like whether or not I would pass organic chemistry, what I should major in, if i would get into grad school, and why people didn't show up for marching band sponsored bake sales (one time I skipped classes because no one else showed up to work the bake sale and I felt bad, maybe I would have passed organic chemistry if I had made better choices). It seems trivial now. Who needs organic chemistry? It's just a class. Of course you'll get into grad school, you're a smart kid. Who cares if people don't show up, it's just a bake sale. In seven years none of this will matter. Still, at the time, these were the big issues in my life (along with the occasional dramatic relationship post or the existential "why am I here?" post). I guess it is impressive how far I have come, but on the other hand, has anything really changed? I'm still in a perpetual state of being stressed out. Will I ever finish grad school? Will I find a job that I like? How does health insurance work, and do I really need it? Why am I here? Why don't people show up for committee meetings?

It's amazing to me how reading these things can transport you back to that time where you felt things so intensely. I suppose that is the reason for the present blog. Maybe seven years from now none of this will matter. Of course you finished grad school, you're a smart kid. Naturally you found a job that paid well and actually had benefits. You totally figured out what you are doing with your life and now have your shit together.

I may consider posting some "throwback blogs" (that's a cool name, right?). It can be an academic kind of experiment. Maybe college kids will be tasked with analyzing two of my blogs spaced seven or so years apart. They will have to analyze it and come up with themes, and will generally hate the assignment. Then, I will go look for my junior high diary. Yes, I kept it. That will surely have some legit teen angst in it.